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Learning and development

Health, Learning and development, Psychology, Wellness

Benefits from the Ocean

There is a saying: “Only a fool, does not fear the ocean”. Well I would not say that I fear the ocean anymore, but I have deep respect for it. I live close to the ocean and I use it several times a week. I love doing different linds of exercises and running at the beach and I swim as often as I can.

Tine Simonsen Halds billede.

Once I really did fear the ocean. You know the deep blue sea, not knowing what is beneath you, and the fear of drowning.

The ocean has helped me to overcome this in a long process where I have forced myself to feel comfortable in the water, in swimming pools and in the ocean. I have learned breathing techniques and how to hold your breath and diving pushing your limits. It all is about learning to relax and convincing yourself that you can do it and it is all right.

It´s all about knowing and sensing,

relaxing and overcoming,

pushing and doing

Swiming and diving is just good for your mental and physical health. If you are not comfortable with it. Start the process. It is a fantastic journey inside of you.

Tine Simonsen Halds billede.

It is a process you alone can start, and you alone can work with and finish in the end.

Tine Simonsen Halds billede.

Tine Simonsen Halds billede.

Do it for yourself. It is a long journey that you will never regret.

 

Love, Health And Wisdom

Brian

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Learning and development, Mindset

Rules of a Gentleman

The Age of the Gentleman — that semi-imaginary time we all have in our heads where men you actually wanted to sleep with wore fedoras and treated ladies like ladies — might be over, but there’s no reason it can’t come back again. I certainly should. We just need to set up a few ground rules for being a modern Cary Grant/Paul Newman/Ken Cosgrove. We’ll all be drinking scotch and wearing linen suits again in no time.

Being a gentleman is more about than just acts of chivalry. The truth is, it’s about dealing directly with man’s greatest burden, his unfilled potential.

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If you become obsessed with being the most courteous man in the world, you’ll end up in one place:

A life of quiet desperation.

The reality is, you need a war plan that’s ethical, moral and honest. For most, accepting the truth isn’t easy.

A great deal of the rules for being a gentleman in today’s times are written for the weak minded males.

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Any man of decent character already knows how to treat a woman and the simplest rules of common courtesy. These choices all come to us naturally. A gentleman doesn’t need a reminder to do the right thing; he walks tall, sure of both his words and actions.

While every male is born a man, being a successful gentleman is not for everyone.

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Regardless of whether you are picking up a man or a woman, you do so with tact, confidence and humility. You do not treat people as commodity to be conquered, but as souls to be loved.

Rules of a gentleman - Euroman

Some girls like them bad, some like them nerdy. However, there is one breed of a man that will forever have a soft spot in the hearts of ladies: the gentleman. True gentlemen, as some ladies lament, are a dying breed. While it was once the gold standard of being a true man, the art of being a gentleman is slowly fading from the modern guy’s consciousness. Finding a real man, then, is a rare treat.

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Now, before you go out and ride on a thoroughbred stallion like some period drama character, the ways of a true gentleman actually differ from what Hollywood tropes suggest. Nope, you don’t need to dress like a dandy and sport a phony British accent, like you came straight from a Jane Austen novel. Being a gentleman is something you must strive for and should not be treated like an act, where you can go on and off character.

 

Love, Health And Wisdom

Brian

 

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Health, Learning and development, Physical activity, Wellness

Multi Exercise Series 1

The Burpees-Halasana

Multi exercises are good because you activate and train all different kinds of muscles in your body. This is a healthy dynamic way of doing a great thing for your body.

In this exercise I have combined the traditional Burpees with the yoga Halasana.

Burpees and the Halasana lookes like below:

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Now I am going to show you how. You may be a little stiff in your body like me, better or worse, but by the time you will be more flexible, if you work on that too.

And remember the grass is not greener on the otherside ;o). It is your choice, how green your grass is. I am working on that, you can see.

 

Love, Health And Wisdom

Brian

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Health, Learning and development, Mindset, Psychology, Wellness

Improve Your Body Image NOW

What do you feel when you look in the mirror? Gratitude? Acceptance? Contentment? Or disappointment and shame?

Poor body image is an issue that many of us struggle with. It doesn’t matter how many articles we read that tell us it’s what’s on the inside that counts; standing in front of a harshly-lit changing room mirror can make us feel defeated.

All of this leads to unrealistic expectations of what we should look like, dress like, and act like. As technology advances and we’re more connected than ever, it seems that self esteem — especially of millennials — declines. Recent studies show a definite link between social media usage and low self esteem. It’s way too easy to fall down a rabbit hole on Facebook or Instagram. You can be on your feed and next thing you know you’re on your ex-boyfriend’s sister’s best friend’s page wishing you had abs as great as hers.

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Despite what we may believe, nobody’s perfect! Women and men in magazines are groomed, and photoshopped to match society’s preference. And let’s not forget that the “ideal body” changes constantly with the trends. Think about it. In the ‘90s, Kate Moss was the archetype of the “perfect woman” — fairy looking features and an extremely skinny figure. Did anyone think heroin-chic was healthy? Now, the tables have turned to favor “thick” women with generous curves, a la the Kardashian family. Following beauty fads can be exhausting and dangerous.

Comparing ourselves to others is the root of all evil when it comes to negative body image. Every single one of us is beautiful in our own way, and yet we are always looking at others and coveting something that they have and we don’t — or think we don’t have. We look at ourselves and think that we aren’t good enough the way we are. Why is it so hard to just accept ourselves?

Because body image, how we do and should look, envelops us.

Our first assessment of people is based on how they look. Advertising preys on self-doubt, encouraging us to perceive a problem (our body size, skin tone, dress sense) and then gratifyingly provides the solution (weight loss and muscle toning programs/equipment/food-like-substances, make-up/cleansing regimens/spa treatments/laser clinics… and clothes. Lots of clothes).

And we can be so cruel. To ourselves and to others, with a particular, special focus on women. It doesn’t matter if you’re fat, skinny, muscly, soft, hairy or bald… there is a brand of body shaming to fit your type.

Determine if you have a negative body image. You may already know if you have a negative body image, but there are some simple criteria that may help you if you are unsure. Ask yourself the following questions to determine if you have a negative body image:[2]

  • Do you perceive your shape in an unrealistic way?
  • Do you think that only other people are attractive?
  • Do you think that your body size or shape is a sign of personal failure?
  • Do you feel ashamed, self-conscious, and anxious about your body?
  • Do you feel uncomfortable and awkward in your body?
  • If you answer yes to any of these questions, you may have a negative body image.

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Culturally, we have this perverse notion that poor body image is a sign of modesty. It’s not. And people, especially women, who accept and appreciate the way they look can be perceived as narcissistic. They’re not.

Feeling badly about the way we look can be a devastating blow to our overall self-confidence, affecting multiple aspects of our lives. Which is why it is important to re-frame the way we view, think and talk about our bodies.

The following are 10 tips that helped me get over my body shame and start genuinely appreciating this life vessel I inhabit. None of them, I repeat, none of them, involve taking a mirror selfie in a bikini.

With 90 percent of collegiate women and 80 percent of collegiate men not liking what they see when they look in the mirror, you can probably imagine that I get asked the question: “How can I improve my body image?” on a fairly frequent basis. I do teach the Psychology of Eating, after all, and body image is a topic we cover extensively.

Here’s my answer: While there is no one way to improve your body image, a combination of any of the following may help:

and one more thing. Exercise regularly and eat healthily. Working out and setting goals can help you feel great both physically and mentally. A balanced diet is key, as well. That being said, you shouldn’t compulsively over-exercise or obsessively count calories. It’s tough to balance, but try to focus on the internal benefits of a healthy lifestyle rather than the external ones.

What you resist, you become. Fighting against yourself and loathing your body only stimulates more neurochemicals that keep you spinning your wheels. The exciting thing is: you can change. Change your mind, change your life. How? Make the decision to shift your thinking and your emotions will follow.

My final word on the matter is that positive self-image is a habit, not an attribute. I don’t always feel great about every aspect of the way I look, but if I’m feeling less than supremely confident, I pull my shoulders back, hold my head up and fake it ‘til I make it.

How do you feel about your body? Do you have any additional body-positive tips to share?

I can help you in this matter. Together we will kick ass.

Cetrine Boes' billede.

 

Love, Health And Wisdom

Brian

 

 

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Learning and development, Psychology

The Addiction And Recovery Tree

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Trauma Informed Model of Addiction

At the bottom of the addiction tree is the soil and seeds of addiction, which consists of emotional, physical, sexual, and spiritual neglect or abuse. These are combined with innate hereditary factors.  This unhealthy foundation creates the tree’s roots – the very painful feeling of toxic shame and the resulting fear, anger, grief, and loneliness of the lost and rejected self.

The trunk of the addiction tree is the wounded psyche or self, and our sense of emptiness and isolation which we yearn to fulfil. The branches of the tree are an attempt to escape our painful feelings of shame, fear, anger, depression and sadness.

Spiritually, we are also trying to become whole again – attempting to mend our broken heart. These are the components of addiction in its many forms, and why it’s often described as an illness of the mind, body, and soul.

The Recovery Tree

Tree

The soil and seeds of recovery are a loving and nurturing environment and relationships. This healthy foundation of life creates the roots of security, self-esteem and confidence, gratitude, empathy, unselfishness, self-acceptance and compassion, and the ability to love oneself and others.

The trunk of recovery is a healthy sense of self and emotional sobriety. We feel connected to love and wholeness, and have a sense of spiritual awareness and well-being in our lives. The fruits of recovery are healthy, meaningful relationships with self, others, and the world. We become increasingly able to live a fulfilling and abundant life. We self-actualise and can now realise our true potential and authentic-self.

Recommended Reading:

The Roots of Addiction – Unmet Needs for Love and Security.

Love, Health And Wisdom

Brian

 

 

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Health, Healthy food, Learning and development, Nature, Wellness

Do You Deserve SuperFoods?

I will here give you a list of SuperFoods. Just because you deserve to give your body the best nutrition every day. The keyword is NON PROCESSED FOODS.

Mixed Bowl of Berries

Berries

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Each egg has 6 grams of protein but just 72 calories. No wonder researchers at Pennington Biomedical Research Center in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, found that eating eggs for breakfast (as part of a low-cal diet) helps you slim down.

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It’s loaded with lycopene, which makes your skin look younger and keeps your heart healthy. In fact, a Harvard study found that women with the most lycopene in their blood reduced their risk of a heart attack by 34%.

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They’re packed with polyphenols — plant chemicals that have been shown to boost bone density by stimulating your bone-building cells.

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Just 14 walnut halves provide more than twice your daily dose of alpha-linolenic acid, an omega-3 fat that’s been shown to improve memory and coordination.

They have more glucosinolates (compounds that combat cancer and detoxify our bodies) than any other vegetable. For a side dish that will make you wonder why you’ve been avoiding them, slice each one into quarters, then sauté in olive oil with chopped sweet Vidalia onions.

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A glass or two (or even a boost in your morning smoothie) of this anthocyanin-rich berry juice can dramatically boost the amount of antioxidants in your blood, says Texas A&M University researchers.

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Apples contain quercetin, an antioxidant that may reduce your risk of lung cancer.

This calcium-rich veggie can protect your bones and may even ward off PMS symptoms.

Because steel-cut oats are less processed than traditional oats, they’re digested more slowly, keeping you full all morning long.

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You’ll get all the heart-smart omega-3s you need in a day from just 3 oz.

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The healthy fat in avocado keeps you satisfied and helps you absorb other nutrients. For a new twist, brush a halved avocado (pit removed) with olive oil and grill for one minute. Serve with red onion, sliced grapefruit, and balsamic vinegar.

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Pumpkin is filled with the natural cancer fighters alpha- and beta-carotene.

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A half-cup provides more than five times your daily dose of vitamin K, which helps blood clot and builds strong bones.

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Need a reason to add cauliflower into your diet? It’s packed with cancer-fightingglucosinolates.

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Scallops

A 3-oz serving has 14 grams of protein but just 75 calories.

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Collard greens are exploding with nutrients like vitamin A, zeaxanthin, and lutein, which keep your eyes healthy. You can also use Kale or white cabbage.

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Olives deliver the same heart-healthy monounsaturated fat you get in olive oil, but for just 7 calories per jumbo olive.

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Brown rice is a top source of magnesium, a mineral your body uses for more than 300 chemical reactions, like building bones and converting food to energy.

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Oysters keep your immune system strong. A 3-oz serving (about 6 oysters) dishes up a quarter of your daily iron, plus nearly twice the zinc and all the selenium you need in a day.

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One cup of edamame a whopping 22 grams of plant protein, as well as lots of fiber, folate, and cholesterol-lowering phytosterols.

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Strawberries are loaded with ellagitannins, phytochemicals that may halt the growth of cervical and colon cancers.

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A great source of meat-free protein, a half-cup of cooked lentils gives you nearly half your daily folate, a B vitamin that protects a woman’s unborn baby from neural tube defects.

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Italian researchers found kiwi reduces asthma-related wheezing thanks to its high vitamin C content (one kiwi has 110% of your daily requirement).

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A quarter-cup of sunflower seeds delivers half your day’s vitamin E, which keeps your heart healthy and fights infection.

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Black beans are loaded with protein, fiber, and flavonoids — antioxidants that help your arteries stay relaxed and pliable.

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Just 3 oz of sardines provides more than 100% of your daily vitamin D. They’re also a top source of omega-3 fats. Try adding mashed canned sardines to marinara sauce and serving over whole-wheat pasta.

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A half-cup of asparagus supplies 50% of your daily bone-building vitamin K and a third of your day’s folate. And since it’s a natural diuretic, it banishes bloating, too.

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Bananas are loaded with several kinds of good-for-you fiber, including resistant starch (which helps you slim down). And remember the most mature ones are the helthiest.

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These sprouts have 10 times more of the cancer-preventing compound glucoraphanin than regular broccoli.

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Each baked potato packs a megadose of blood pressure-lowering potassium — even more than a banana.

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Not only is flaxseed loaded with plant omega-3s, it also has more lignans (compounds that may prevent endometrial and ovarian cancer) than any other food. Store ground flaxseed in your refrigerator and sprinkle on yogurt, cold cereal, oatmeal, or avocado toast.

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Half of a large baked sweet potato delivers more than 450% of your daily dose of vitamin A, which protects your vision and immune system.

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Blackberries are the king of the berry family. They boasts more antioxidants than strawberries, cranberries, or blueberries.

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Brazil nuts have more selenium than any other food. In fact, one nut delivers your entire day’s worth.

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Grapes are a leading source of resveratrol, the plant chemical responsible for the heart-healthy benefits.

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A Tbsp of this heart-healthy oil has all the alpha-linolenic acid you need in a day, plus two different forms of vitamin E.

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Blueberries improve memory by protecting your brain from inflammation and boosting communication between brain cells.

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With just 4 calories per cup, this cruciferous veggie delivers a hefty dose of vitamin K, zeaxanthin, lutein, beta-carotene, and cancer-fighting phytochemicals.

 

If you have other SuperFoods, I would like to hear from you. Remember your body (YOU) deserve the best you can get. Therefore you should only eat this kind of food every day.

 

Love, Health And Wisdom

Brian

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Learning and development, Mindset, Psychology

Are You Assertive?

Are you a human doormat? Do you say “yes” when you mean “no”? Do you keep your opinions to yourself for fear of upsetting or starting an argument with others?

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Assertiveness is the ability to formulate and communicate one’s own thoughts, opinions and wishes in a clear, direct and non-aggressive way. This test determines whether a lack of assertiveness skills may be keeping you from fulfilling your potential and reaching your goals. Please examine the following statements and indicate how often or to what degree you agree with the statement.

Sometimes assertiveness gets a bad name because people confuse it with aggressiveness. But if there were a yardstick to measure human behavior, assertiveness would fall right in the middle, with passiveness at one end and aggressiveness at the other.

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Here are some of the ways that passive, assertive and aggressive people are perceived by others:

Passive people:

  • Have trouble saying no.
  • Do whatever others ask, even if it’s very inconvenient.
  • Get “stepped on” a lot.
  • Talk softly and don’t stand up for their rights.
  • They’re not even sure if they have any rights.
  • Do anything to avoid conflict.
  • Are taken advantage of. They get resentful but don’t tell anyone.

Assertive people:

  • Are firm and direct.
  • Are deliberate
  • Don’t blame others but take full responsibility for their own feelings
  • Concentrate on the present.
  • Can express their needs and feelings calmly and easily.
  • Are confident about who they are.
  • Speak firmly and make eye contact.
  • Respect others’ rights and opinions, and expect the same in return.

Aggressive people:

  • Are loud, bossy and pushy.
  • Get their way, no matter what.
  • React instantly.
  • Like to get even.
  • Don’t care about feelings.
  • Give vice-like handshakes.
  • Believe that winning is everything.

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Few of us are exactly in the middle of this yardstick, but all of us can benefit from consciously practicing assertive behavior. Very passive and very aggressive people often have an underlying lack of self-esteem. If you see yourself as usually at one extreme or the other, self-esteem may be an issue for you to explore further. Use the infographic to find out if you are assertive or not.

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Love, Health And Wisdom

Brian

 

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