For the past many years I have been studying energy. There is energy within everything since everything vibrates and everything is made of atoms on Earth. The Chinese have described energy as being masculine or feminine.
Yin Yang simply expresses the duality in nature. Light/Dark, Hot/Cold, Negative/Positive. There is also everything in between like dawn and dusk, lukewarm and chilled. Like gets paired with like in these instances. This can be tested within human relationships as well. We typically think of pairs like the cheerleader and the jock will date, or maybe sometimes the football player and the band geek. Sometimes seemingly opposites will attract too.
Yin is the dark part of the symbol, the feminine. It is said the symbol works like sunlight passing over a mountain and valley. The Yang’s light will pass over the mountain and valley making what was obscure revealed and what had been revealed, obscure. The symbol also of course follows a spiral, which is associated with the Fibonacci Sequence pattern, meaning balance and harmony.
Yin is associated with slow, cold, wet, soft, passive, yielding, and Yang with fast, hot, dry, hard, aggressive, and force.
For the balance to work, each must be opposites on the scale. If energy is very masculine (10), then its matching energy will be very feminine (10).
Things naturally occur in balance.
This is why some leading businesswomen say they kept attracting more feminine men because maybe she has lost some of their femininity in this modern world and gained more masculine ones. Societal pressures can also make a man more feminine for instance if he was harassed by other males making him feel inferior.
The woman’s role in the workplace today often has to come off very powerful and sometimes even aggressive if she wants to be treated with respect by others. Being part of a landscape architecture studio dominated by males, I often felt this way. Even if we play this role at work, we must learn to leave this role at work as women. Feminine energy is assertive, which is even more powerful than aggression.
If we keep attracting what we do not want in our lives, we have to look at our energy. The feminine role is to receive and the masculine role is to give. It cannot happen any other way unless it’s a mother’s role being fulfilled. Feminine energy is nurturing and reassuring.
It seems in the modern world that feminine energy is seen as weak and undesirable, but true feminine energy is a very powerful force. Feminine energy is aware, all-knowing, and confident. It is calm and is sure of what it wants. It’s honest, it seeks the truth, and is okay with whatever answer because it’s secure. It is not dumb, weak, bitchy, or chaotic. Fake feminine energy is terrible. Fake feminine energy is crying and screaming for attention, or trying to get something from men while manipulating. We all have met some of those women. We’ve even met some men like that too.
Feminine energy doesn’t necessarily mean makeup or lots of clothes either. It goes deeper than that, even though dressing up may help us to feel more feminine.
Treat yourself. Don’t deprive yourself. Put some flowers on the table. Go for the jasmine body oil. Do what makes you happy.
It’s OK to tap into that feminine or masculine energy. It is naturally born within us and if we avoid it, then we are repressing a part of us. Surround yourself with other women’s or men´s energy and become more aware of its power.
Ladies, next time any man offers to do something for you, like open a door, let him do it. It may be awkward at first, but just smile and say thank you. Don’t even say, “Oh, I can do it?“. Don’t lay a finger on that door (unless you really dislike him). If he does a half-ass job opening the door and it falls on you, then allow him to feel inadequate. No man wants to feel inadequate. Opening the door will allow him to feel his masculine energy and allow this balance of energy to play out. A man wants to give, he wants to do things for you, and if he isn’t allowed to do that, he won’t be happy. A man wants to give to make you happy.
Without going deeper into the metaphysical or mystical meaning of these pure forms of Divine energy and how they came to be separated as two different genders, try to understand your energy field as the result of a fusion of the Divine Feminine and Masculine Spirit much like of mother and father energies, only on a deeper level of energy. To explore your inner relationship with the Divine Masculine and Feminine and their state of balance within you, you typically need to look at how we originally perceived these Divine energies through your parents/caretakers representing those energies for you in your early stages.
Many energetic blocks and hidden aspects lead back to a lack or imbalance of our source of energy. While most of us assume that our primary source lies in masculinity for males and femininity for females, energy work teaches us that the primary source is not so much in the singularity of our gender but the unity and balance of both: the Divine Masculine and Feminine within.
From an energetic point of view, stored negative energies around our parents and upbringing not only influence our view and inner programming in regards to gender-specific behaviors and understanding of female and male role modeling, but also our personal ability to identify and connect with Divine Masculine and Feminine energies. Internal masculine/feminine imbalances are therefore very often linked to our parental influences. They determine our personal attitude towards our own and the other gender and our capacity for self-love and unconditionally loving others.
Many of transCODES’ energy work modalities, such as GRACE Integrity® (by P.St.Clair) and Connecting with the Divine Masculine & Feminine are specifically designed to decouple any masculine and feminine programs energetically linked to our parents so that we can experience love from within ourselves without the limitations of our experienced parental love. In those energy processes, we connect with our inner father and mother energies and allow their meaning beyond their parental role for us to unfold. This can create very beautiful and connecting moments if we have/had a loving relationship with our mother and father; but also trigger some resistance or resurfacing of old wounds if we had absent, neglecting, or abusive parents.
While the love of /for our parents can sometimes pave the pathway to our inner Divine Love, it cannot be the source for our self-love, as it still is external energy! This is particularly true for those of us (which is the majority) who had/have a difficult relationship with both or one of our parents, as it often leads to skewed views and selective self-perception, for example, self-worth and intimacy issues.
To show the often unconscious interconnection between our parental energies and the development of our inner masculine/feminine balance I am going to describe two of the most prevalent patterns leading to imbalanced feminine/masculine energies:
If we grew up with a physically or emotionally absent father the missing masculine energies in our early life made it difficult to develop a trusting, loving, and secure inner connection with our own masculinity if we are male; with men, if we are female (vice versa in case of an absent mother). In addition to this, we typically also had to emotionally process our mother’s negative opinion about his absence, which very often cemented this gap even further and affected how we could allow our own identification naturally to happen.
As a result of this energetically single-sided upbringing, we tend to fantasize or mystify the absent energy often leading to an idealized and later unobtainable version of a man or woman. This cannot only block our inner self-love but also influence our romantic relationships negatively. With an unreal expectation of ourselves and/or the other gender our relationship experiences often retraumatize us and increase our missing inner balance. Self-worth, trust, and intimacy issues are very common phenomena tied to an imbalance of masculine-feminine connection.
Another example is the overbearing, hyper-critical, or controlling mother. If we experienced femininity as controlling, never satisfied, or even manipulating, our choices to embrace inner femininity become pretty limited (vice versa in the case of a controlling father). If we are female, we often either rebel against feminine energy by favoring our masculine energies and by rejecting femininity altogether; or we unconsciously connect love with control and repeat our mother’s patterns. If we are male, the two typical ways to react to this experience are: Trying to comply out of fear of wrath and developing pleasing and co-dependency patterns (never feeling good enough); or acting out counter-control mechanisms, repressed anger, mistrust, and resentment towards femininity through predatory and often sexual manipulation or degradation (here I would like to mention that excessive watching of pornography can be a coveted form of sexual degradation.)
There are many other examples of our masculine and feminine energies can get trapped in our disturbing experience of love through same or opposite gender identification problems. The main thing to realize is that these aspects and their energetic attachments are merely dispositions. If we can manage to energetically decouple them from our parents they can easily be reintegrated. One way to do this is to actively seek the inner connection to masculine and feminine energies through connecting with their original Divine source instead keeping them tied to actual persons. In this manner, we can circumvent our personal memories and parental programming by healing this inner relationship through the Divine Field within.
In other words, we all can build our own balanced connection with Masculinity and Femininity free of parental programs. This is a very important step not only in self-healing but also in spirituality in general, as our a masculine/feminine imbalance typically shows on almost all other energetic levels:
- Chakra-Energy Flow
- Emotional and Mental processing
- Expression and Communication of Self
- Manifestation of Self
- True Self Connection
- Inner Child
- Ability to Trust
- Ability to Connect/True Intimacy
- Ability to Love and Self-Love
The balance of inner Divine Masculine and Feminine Energies is the main vibratory resonance needed for unlocking our true inner and outer connection and soul integrity. Without them, we are just minds or bodies with a fragmented soul attachment, unaware of who we truly are and what we came here for.
“You open the gates of the soul to let the dark flood of chaos flow into your order and meaning. If you marry the ordered to the chaos you produce the divine child, the supreme meaning beyond meaning and meaninglessness.”Carl Jung, The Red Book – Reader’s Edition.